Feeling (and looking) Bigger but Feeling Great

At 31 weeks, we have been lucky to have a 4D scan, where we can view Baby Patterson more completely. As I continue to grow and get a bit more uncomfortable, especially in this heat, it is incredible to remember what a miracle it is that there is this life being fine tuned inside my belly. The 4D scan photos are somewhat cool (even Cory and I struggled with these alien-like images and would have preferred whole-body shots via ultrasound instead as the placement of Baby P and the shadows made "photographing" him difficult), but they may also freak you out some:

At this point, I have gained 17 pounds. I am carrying quite low, which makes fitting into any sort of shorts or pants incredibly difficult, not to mention that I have limited options in shirts that could even cover the expanding torso. So, dresses and stretchy skirts have become the norm. I am feeling wonderful, considering we are now well into the third trimester. I have seemed to have found a balance between diet, exercise, vitamins and supplements, relaxation and positive thinking that have made carrying this baby a rather joyful experience. I hope to bring this through to the birthing process.

Aiston is processing the baby's impending arrival in his own way. Not only is his brother making him contemplate his own birth, adoption experience and his relationship with me, but Baby P is also making him think deeply about moving on and losing connections with his birth country, birthmother and his friends. He has been extremely sensitive lately to topics surrounding his entry into the world and to adoption itself and we have had some heartbreaking, but necessary, conversations about the miracle that he has been and continues to be. We consistently honor his emotions and share pictures of his birthmother with him, reassuring him that it is normal to have these feelings and that they are valid. He has been acting out, too - in gymnastics class, at school and at home. This could be a sign of things to come, but it is our job as his parents to help him process everything he is feeling and channel his emotions in positive directions. We have really tried to downplay the whole pregnancy experience and although we feel that the baby deserves to have his own story cherished and shared, we mustn't forget the impact that Aiston's lack of a "birth story" with us has on him and must highlight that both of our boys' journeys to us are of equal importance and uniqueness.

We feel very blessed to spend three more weeks in the Philippines, cherishing time with our friends who have become our family. We have been planning special activities with Aiston and have been counting down the days to our departure with a chain. Every night, Aiston rips off a link and we write down something we are grateful for about living here for the past eight years. We think this might help all of us to begin to say goodbye and make sense of all the changes to come. We are ready for this, but we are not naive. It will not be easy. And while the grass may literally be greener in Prague, there will be some discolored, patchy spots, too.